Kim Rees on LinkedIn: How do you see the future? Can you see it? The tomato in this… (2024)

Kim Rees

Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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How do you see the future?Can you see it?Thetomatoin this picture.Actually, at this stage of its development we wouldn't call it a tomato yet, but it is coming. It is already there.It's that delicateyellow blossomthat looks nothing like atomato.It doesn't make sense that a yellow blossom can become first a hardgreen globeand then ajuicy red tomato.But it does.Right now, it isunrecognizable.Unimaginable.If I hadn't seen it happen before I might not believe it. It is a littlemiraclethat happens in my backyard.You have incredible potential.It is already there.Can you see it?Right now, it might seemunrecognizable.Unimaginable.It is hard work for our brains to imagine howglorious and miraculousthe future can be. So, we mostly go to the past to predict the future. This only creates more of what we already have. If we want something new, we first have to imagine that it is possible.I used to feel completely stuck, like there was no happy path forward for me.Life coaching helped me realize that I am not going to stumble across a happy path forward that someone else has created. I need to be thecreator of my own happy path forward. I can't create it from my past. I have to look into the future of infinite possibility and start cutting that path on purpose.Every day is a new opportunity to work on that path. It is hard work.Life is a choice between two flavors of hard. The hard that moves us forward and the hard that keeps us stuck.We get to create what we want.What do you want?What would you like to create?What are youwillingto create?Transformation is possible.

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Tanner Rees

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Create and transform!!

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    How do you know when it's working?When Does success start?...Saturday NightAnother sellout crowd.Luke Combs took the stage to the cheers of delighted fans.Among his own hit songs, he played afan favorite.A song that was born before Luke was born.The rebirth of a song that Luke has given new life. Fast Carby Tracy Chapman.Luke Combs told the crowd thatFast Car was the first song he learned to play on his guitar. The guitar that his parents gave him in seventh grade. The one thatsat in the closet until he was 21.This was a full circle moment.He didn't want to learn guitar because his parents wanted him to.He finally picked it up in college.That first song that he plucked out on that guitarbirthed Luke's career.He had no idea at the time he was learning it.No idea that this song that was older than him would put him on stageat theGrammy'sto sing a duet with its creator,Tracy Chapman.He was just trying to learn to play the guitar.When did he become successful? Luke saw no hints of success while he learned to play Fast Car on his $50 acoustic guitar, but success was coming.Big success!Luke Combs cover of Fast Car became even more popular than the original."You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So, you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future."Steve JobsSo, how do you know when "its" working?What if its already working?From the first strum.It's working.It didn't feel like it to him. He can only connect the dots looking back.All the small things we do today count.As long as we don't quit,success is inevitable.Failure will be part of the success. Failure and success live in the same neighborhood.If you aren't failing, then you aren't even in the neighborhood of success.Keep failing better. It's all success.Kindly,Kim Rees

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    Are you taking it on the chin?Do you know who is doing the punching?You are. Do you ever catch yourself having an argument in your head with someone who is not even in the room? Are you arguing about something that hasn’t even happened.Are you imagining what they would say…that they haven’t actually said? How does this make you feel?The feeling is very real, right?As if the argument is really happening. You can get really worked up and make yourself miserable. That is exactly what is happeningYOU are making YOURSELF miserable. The other person has no idea that their ghost is arguing with you in your mind. They are not feeling the same emotion. They are not causing your emotions.It feels really important to your brain to run this all the way to the end, because you are sure you know how it ends. But it is not reality. It is just happening in your thoughts. How long do you want to let this imaginary argument make you miserable?In other words,how long do you want to keep punching yourself in the face?Yes, it is not easy to change the channel in your mind when you are so invested in this argument, but what is the alternative?Punching yourself in the face.Ask yourself. Are you having this argument in your mind to avoid having it in real life? Notice how that is working for you."If you avoid conflict to keep the peace, you start a war inside yourself." Cheryl RichardsonMaybe conflict isn't the problem.Maybe the problem is the way we do conflict. Take some slow deep breaths.Relax your body and focus all thelove and compassionyou can muster onyourself.

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    Aurora Borealis FOMOThenorthern lightswere visible from the Seattle area recently.The viewing conditions were unusually good.While many people were snappingphotos of a lifetime,I was asleep.I totally missed it.It is crazy to think about.Thenorthern lightswere right outside my window, and I wascompletely unaware.Some people were marveling at a once in a lifetime experience while I was sleeping through it.The fascinating thing is…If I had not seen other people’s pictures and heard their excitement about the experience, I never would have felt the slightest twinge of regret that I was sleeping at 11pm that night.The event I was helping with during that week required very long days and shorts nights.I valued every minute of rest I got that night,untilI learned there was another great option I missed.Aurora Borealisin the night sky right above medid not create my experience.Arguing with reality, by wishing I had been outside to witness the night sky, is the only thing that created myFOMO.Missing the chance to see the northern lights had no effect on me until I had a thought about it.Ourcirc*mstancesdon’t create ourexperience.Themeaningwe give to our circ*mstances is whatcreatesourexperience.The meaning I gave to sleeping when others were witnessing the northern lights is what created that feeling that I had missed out.There is no upside to FOMO.There are an infinite number of things that I missed out on that night.Most of them don’t bother me at all because I spend no time thinking about what I missed.Once we become aware of something that we missed out on, it is easy to jump on that hamster wheel trying to chase after something that we will never catch.Our brains seem to love the chase.We entertain lots of thoughts that start with “if only…”The antidote to FOMO is to feel disappointed.Just feel disappointed.Relax into disappointment instead of resisting it.That might sound like a terrible idea to you, but what is the alternative?FOMO? Does FOMO really feel better than disappointment?You are already disappointed, so trying not to feel it is only making the disappointment stronger.The other alternative is the open loop of FOMO.There is no resolution to wishing things were different.Plus, it’s exhausting.Just be disappointed instead and move on.I also like to try out JOMO.JOMOis thejoy of missing out.Until I knew there was something going on that I would have liked, I wasPERFECTLY HAPPYwith my decision to go to bed. IENJOYEDgoing to bed.The beautiful thing is that I can hold two things at once. I can be disappointed that I missed the northern lights and also know the JOMO of going to bed after a long day with an early morning ahead of me.Both are true.How do you handle FOMO?Try just being disappointed and honoring what you chose to do.I would love to hear how it goes for you.

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    You are being spied on constantly.The reconnaissance is highly sensitive and highly inaccurate.The culprit? Your nervous system.Your nervous system is constantly scanning for danger. When it picks up on a perceived threat it creates an emergency response. This is why you suddenly feel anxious, irritated, angry, frustrated, insecure, embarrassed, or dozens of other unpleasant feelings. Your nervous system is dysregulated. It is preparing you to meet the threat; to fight, flee, or freeze.Your brain finds it easy to fill in the gaps with thoughts that match the emergency response the nervous system already has underway. This creates more negative emotions.Your nervous system is a beautiful thing, and it is working perfectly. You just want to learn how to manage it.You want to learn how to regulate your nervous system.This is the key to feeling better.This is how you create resilience.I teach a simple 3-step process for creating resilience by regulating your nervous system. If you would like me to share this presentation with your work team May is your best chance. May is Mental Health Awareness Month. To serve the community I am offering to teach this seminar to groups for free. Message me if you would like schedule a time for your team.

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    Awareness is where the magic happens, just don't expect it to feel magical.It gets me every time.It stings a little (or a lot).Awareness also opens the door to new growth.Without new awareness we create more of what we already have.We often resist and avoid awareness because we wish that something so magical would FEEL magical. So, we look the other way and ignore that awareness that is tapping us on the shoulder. Like the lyrics of the old song "I wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then."Dropping the expectation for the magic of awareness to FEEL magical, is how we also find the best friend of awareness.The perfect companion to awareness is acceptance.This is when we stop arguing with reality and we start moving forward.If you are feeling stuck, these are your two new best friends, Awareness and Acceptance.Awareness + Acceptance = Empowered.

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    Do you react to...Your boss.Your kids.Your spouse.Drivers on the road.The neighbor's dog.Your mom?Do you feel like it just happens?Like it is out of your control?Would you like to change that?You're invited to join me on zoom Thursday, February 8 at 7pm PST.The event is FREE, but the impact will be life changing.Message me if you would like me to send you the zoom link.

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    I did it again!And again, and again!It was the best news ever!At first blush it felt terrible!It always does.Friday, I stopped resisting. I decided to do something that felt overwhelming and hard. (It was a tech issue...my favorite)I had put it off for too long!As I finally got started, it was overwhelming and hard.I persevered through the slog andfinished it. After, I could see more clearly.Hindsight...you know.I could see that putting it off did not make doing it any easier. I could see that putting it off cost me some opportunities. I could see that putting it off made it bigger and scarier than it was.In short:I was wrong(for putting it off).It was all my fault(I put it off) ...ANDthis is the best news ever!The best news ever because ifI am wrongandit is all my fault,I have all the power.I can take full responsibility. This is a good place to be.It was exhausting to be honest.You know what else is tiring? Not changing. Not being willing to be wrong. Putting off what I know needs to be done. That is exhausting. This time I chose the discomfort that moved me forward over the discomfort that kept me stuck. The lessons I learned kept finding me the next day.I saw SOOO many ways this same scenario shows up daily in my life.I started to see what it is costing me. Awareness is where the magic happens (just don't expect it to feel magical).Finding out where you are wrong is the best news ever.What if you could start to see it that way?How would it change your life?It could make all the difference!Have you had a similar experience? I would love to hear about it.

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    We all have an amazing tool that most of us don't know how to use. It was an honor to chat with you Aaron J Jacobs about our amazing nervous system.

    91. How To Regulate Your Nervous System With Kim Rees

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  • Kim Rees

    Business Owner | Certified Life Coach | Public Speaker | Nervous System Resilience Informed | Your partner in elevating your life

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    My oldest son had a traumatic experience when he was 3.He was abandoned by his mom. She forgot him and left him behind.He had a new baby brother, something that threw a wrench in the works of a 3-year-olds life.As mom and the boys arrived home, the van came to a stop inside the garage.Mom got out of the car. She carefully took sleeping baby brother in his infant seat out of the back seat.She went into the house, the door swung shut, leaving the 3-year-old alone.Abandoned.In the car by himself.Strapped in his car seat so he couldn’t get out.Fear and panic filled him.She chose the baby.She left him.He cried.Then.Mom came back.Through sobs he exclaimed “you forgot me.”Mom never forgot him.Even through the lack of sleep mom-brain-fog, she never forgot him. She was always coming back for him.She knew she had him safe.Safely buckled into his car seat, inside the van, inside the garage.She was aware and she was coming.This was not his experience. All he knew was how helpless and hopeless and panicked he felt.He was sure he had been forgotten.For several nights when baby brother would cry in the night to be fed, big brother would wake up too exclaiming “you forgot me.”Mom would hold both boys in the night. Nursing the baby and comforting the 3-year-old.They were all safe and well, but they didn’t FEEL safe and well.Mom was not enough. No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t make everyone happy. She should be able to make everyone happy.Clearly, she was failing to meet everyone’s needs, including her own.She would have to try harder; she would have to do better.Can you relate?The FEELINGS were REAL, but they were NOT REALITY.Mom was doing a good job. (Not a perfect job, but a good job)The kids were not just safe, they were well cared for, adored, and loved. The feelings did not match the reality.This is often the case.You can FEEL very unsafe even when you are safe.You can FEEL like you are failing when you are doing a good job.You are not broken. You are a human, having the whole human experience.You also have a healthy brain and nervous system that are trying to protect you. Unfortunately, the brain and nervous system often find danger where there is no danger. Then, we end up feeling unsafe when we are empirically safe. Look back and find a time when you had a similar experience to my son. Can you see how you felt unsafe, but you were empirically safe? What can you learn from this perspective?I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments!Kim ReesP.S. There is so much we can do to befriend our nervous system and create a feeling of safety. I am hosting a free webinar; Thursday, February 8 at 7pm Pacific/8pm Mountain. I will teach you a simple 3 step process to do whenever you feel stressed to help you feel better and become more resilient. Message me and I will send you the zoom link to the webinar.

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Kim Rees on LinkedIn: How do you see the future?

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The tomato in this… (2024)
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